Has anyone ever broken your heart? Have you ever been disappointed in a relationship? Has a woman you thought things were going really well with ever, out of the blue, told you that you should find someone better and then proceeded to ignore your attempts to contact her? Yeah, me neither, but I hear that happens to guys a lot. Nice Guys finish last they say. I’ve started to believe it, but I wonder, why?
Your friends will tell you that you’re better off, that there’s a million other fish in the sea, or any other string of cliches and trite little sayings meant to console you, but do they help? Does someone saying, “Well, it’s her loss,” seriously make you feel better? I don’t think it would make me feel any better, if someone were saying it to me, if I found myself in a situation like that. I read that loneliness is as bad for you physically as cigarettes or drug abuse. Maybe it IS your loss?
Why does it seem like a Nice Guy can’t catch a break in the romance department? You’re funny, smart, attractive, you treat women well, you’re polite, and Moms love you. You could be having the most fun you’ve had in a long time with a woman, and you could be thinking, wow, I may have just got really lucky and found someone I’d like to spend time with and get to know better and WHAM. Out of nowhere, she starts telling you that she’s got issues, baggage, a history, or whatever, and that she’s not usually like this, doesn’t want to get involve with anyone after all, even though you “met” on a dating website where, theoretically, you’re both there to actually find a person to spend that time with, that she thinks you could do so much better, etc…
But, enough with the hypotheticals. Let’s talk about reality. What do you Nice Guys out there find the most frustrating about relationships and what do you do if you find yourself in these kinds of situations? Do you find yourself finishing last? Should Nice Guys really expect more from the women out there? Are Nice Guys just not doing it right?
Ladies, feel free to chime in here as well. Your perspective is imperative to understanding how this all works.